


shenanigans

by stardating



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Animal Transformation, M/M, Magic, Squirrels, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:01:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25540246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardating/pseuds/stardating
Summary: Tony woke up like this and rued the day. If only this were because of some evil villain or something he could take his indignation out on.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 11
Kudos: 72





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was absolutely silly, turned out a bit longer than I expected it to be, and pretty much no research on squirrels was done. It also took longer to do than I expected. So, for those of you looking forward to this, sorry about that! Hope you still enjoy!

Tony hated magic.

He hated magic for very, very good reasons.

Jane could be the scientist going out to space to figure out the differences and similarities, bridging the two together, but he was happy to remain on earth and do things like fix climate change and annoy the hell out of reporters who need to relearn some manners and ethics.

Magic was something he was content with leaving alone.

(Somewhere, he knows, Pepper was feeling less stressed and didn’t know why.)

The moment he woke up, he knew something was wrong.

First, he was too warm.

Second, he was really twitchy.

Third? He could not find the edge of his bed even though it was not that large.

(Okay, so that is a lie. Compared to twin sized beds. Oh, fine, king sized beds.)

“J?” he called, his voice sounding odd. Oh god, it was like a cartoon. “What are my visuals?”

“You are currently in your bed, sixty centimeters from the end, thirty centimeters from the left edge,” JARVIS replied. “You appear to be approximately seventeen centimeters long.”

Tony felt his ear twitch. Then his other ear.

“I’ve been turned into an animal,” he muttered. Going to the left side of his bed, it didn’t take him long to land on the floor and look at what used to be human hands. He quickly figured out that unlike some of the stories out there, like in _Hocus Pocus_ , he had not been turned into a cat. No, for some reason, someone thought he should become a squirrel.

The tail that automatically wrapped around his hindquarters gave it away.

“J, have all my meetings cleared and moved around for … the next three days. Medical reasons or something reasonable no one will question.”

“Very good, sir. I shall inform Miss Potts as well.”

“What—no—wait—!”

Pepper opened a video call a few moments later. “Tony, what does JARVIS mean by you’ve been turned into a squirrel?”

Tony lifts a paw and scratches behind his ear. It’s weird.

“Well, exactly what he said.”

“Oh my god,” she muttered in disbelief. “You’re a squirrel. Tony, we’ve got to figure out how this happened and how to reverse it.”

“I know, Pep, but I swear, I went to bed last night and woke up like this. Unless I was sleepwalking, I didn’t do anything.”

“We could call Doctor Strange,” she offered. “If anything, he could probably snap his fingers.”

About two hours later, Doctor Steven Strange was humming at Tony, hand to his chin, and confirming that he could not merely snap his fingers.

“What do you mean?” Tony growled, hating how his voice went higher.

“You are correct in that magic is the source of this change, but if I were to accelerate this spell, it would cause physical harm to you. It would be better to let it run its course.”

Tony grumbled and dragged his hands down his face.

His tiny little hands and his fuzzy face.

God.

“So, what am I supposed to do in the meantime?” he demanded.

“Not get eaten by a bird?” Strange suggested.

Tony hoped his glare was full of the fury his tiny little body contained.

* * *

“Sir, do you think this is wise?” JARVIS asked.

“They’re my air vents,” Tony quipped, skittering down the air vents some more. He always wondered why Clint liked to go through them, popping out whenever it was most inconvenient for everyone else. Sure, someone might say it was for security purposes and because it was a convenient way for a stealthy spy to go around unnoticed. That was a valid response. But Tony knew deep in his heart that Clint secretly hummed the _Mission Impossible_ theme to himself.

And liked to be an eavesdropper.

“Besides, what could happen?”

Suddenly, an arrow with a suction cup at the end hit the wall right in front of him, missing him only by a hair.

Tony yelped and spun around. He could feel all of his fur stand on end.

That asshole missed on _purpose_.

“Clint!”

“Oh, shit.” Clint’s voice echoed a bit, so he clearly had a visual on Tony, but not the reverse. “They were serious about that? You’re really a squirrel?”

“JARVIS, freeze whatever section Barton is in,” Tony growled.

“Only to temperatures he can withstand,” JARVIS compromised.

“Stark! Come on! Do you know how often squirrels get in here? It’s a legitimate security—oh my god that got cold fast!”

* * *

Eventually, Tony made his way to the kitchen. Natasha was at the breakfast table, reading a book with a cup of steaming tea. She probably just sat down.

“Here,” she said absently, pushing forward a bowl. “Squirrels burn through a lot of energy.”

Tony narrowed his eyes, not sure if he should be offended or not. The bowl wasn’t full of peanuts, but a spicy mixed nut blend. All sorts of stuff that was probably good for your heart, if not for the sodium content. “Since when do you know anything about squirrels?”

Natasha flicked her eyes up from her book. “Knowledge is power. Never underestimate even the most random of facts.”

Tony slowly approached the bowl and started eating a walnut half.

“You scare me.”

Natasha grinned.

* * *

Bruce came in about an hour later. Tony had finished half of the nuts and some water Natasha poured into another bowl. It was awkward and a little humiliating, but surviving this was a little more important than what little dignity he had left.

“Huh,” was all Bruce said before he went to make some tea for himself.

“What, no questions?” Tony asked.

Bruce jumped. “You can talk.”

“Yeah. It’s magic—I’m just in the form of a squirrel, not actually a squirrel.”

Bruce sighed deeply while looking at the ceiling and then turned the tea kettle off. “You’ll have to forgive me, but I’m going back to bed. It’s too late in the morning to deal with something out of a Disney movie.”

“It’s 9:30!”

“Let him have his sleep,” Natasha said as Bruce shuffled out. “You know you scientists operate on different schedules than the rest of humanity. He’ll probably have a hundred questions later.”

Tony grumbled and flicked his tail, annoyed.

* * *

“Y-You are d-dead to m-me.”

“What? Couldn’t handle the cold?” Tony smirked.

Clint looked thoroughly chilled, his teeth chattering and the end of his nose red. JARVIS might put on a mild-mannered, polite façade, but he was Tony’s creation. Buried under the desire to always be helpful and keep Tony (and certain others) alive if possible was a lot of second-hand sass and deviousness that most did not get to see. Tony would need to get the footage later.

Natasha snickered. “It couldn’t have been as bad as Milwaukee.”

“What happened in Milwaukee?” Tony asked, his ears perking up.

“Nothing,” Clint hissed. “Nothing happened in that hell hole.”

* * *

“Oh, Tony,” Pepper sighed.

It was later in the day and to be honest? Being a squirrel sucked and was boring. There were only so many air ducts he could explore now that Clint wasn’t going to shoot him again, keyboards were nearly impossible to handle because of his limited arm span, and he had little luck inventing anything to help him with those handicaps because his screwdrivers were nearly as tall as he was. Forget about soldering or welding anything either!

It was like being back in the Stone Age! He had to start from scratch!

Which was why there were tiny bits of wire, even smaller screws, and a penny piled all around him. He was just about to test the soldering iron, based off a child sized design. He attempted a 3D printing machine version, but it couldn’t handle the temperatures he needed. It worked for the screwdrivers and other tools, but he was still testing their strength. There just wasn’t anything like stainless steel or plain cast iron.

“What?” he asked, brushing soot off his fur. “It’s not that bad.”

“Indeed, sir only has slight scorch marks on four percent of his body,” JARVIS supplied. “I predict that his fur will recover in a few weeks.”

“I don’t plan to have fur for a few more weeks!”

Pepper sighed once more, rubbing her temple. “This might take a few weeks. Has anyone contacted Thor to see if he would know about this?”

Tony gaped. He didn’t think of that.

“I am afraid that Thor is off world and not available to be reached at the moment,” JARVIS said before Tony could ask. “He informed me of this two days ago. He should be back by the end of the week.”

“It’s Tuesday!”

“Yes. He apologized for that, but there were some delicate diplomatic situations he had to be addressed. Captain Rogers was informed of this absence as well.”

Tony muttered under his breath.

“Great. So. Any chance we could get word directly to Loki?”

“You want to risk that?” Pepper asked. “I mean, his temperament has improved … but …”

Tony scowled and waved a paw in the air. “Fine, fine, we’ll just hold off on solving this for a little while longer. Tell everyone I’ll do voice conferences or emails, no video meetings. Tell them I’m sick and still very vain.”

* * *

“You’re a squirrel!”

“Yes, I am,” Tony sighed, munching on some nuts. Wasabi this time.

“But why are you a squirrel?”

“Magic.”

Peter gaped at him, the mask of his suit pulled off of his head.

“How are you a squirrel?”

“Are you going to ask what a squirrel is?”

“No, I was going to ask what you needed help with to finish that suit.”

Tony pointed his tiny screwdriver at Peter. “I knew I liked you for a reason.”

* * *

A few hours later, they were still working on the miniature suit, going over how the power of the arc reactor had been changed with Tony’s body. That was the part of this transformation Tony was doing his best not to be freaked out about, because of all things that magic decided to keep the same, it had to be that. What, did magic decide not messing with technology was the best route to go? Why bother transforming him at all then?

Someone came into the room, not that Peter or Tony noticed.

At least until someone put various snacks in front of them, including some bottles of water. Both of them jumped in surprise.

“Barnes!” Tony yelped.

“Oh, hey,” Peter said, less shocked. “Thanks for the snacks.”

Bucky looked at them for a long moment. Tony and Peter were covered in various mechanical oils and surrounded by tools, cogs, and wires.

“Should I ask?”

“We’re almost done!” Peter said proudly. “JARVIS really helped with adjusting the range of movements Mr. Stark has now, not to mention the different proportions.”

“Thank you, Peter,” JARVIS said.

“Welcome!”

“So this isn’t an attempt to create a squirrel army.” Bucky’s voice was absolutely serious and deadpanned.

“Where did you get an idea like that?” Tony asked as Peter started laughing.

“Internet.”

Peter started laughing harder.

“At least he’s not gotten onto conspiracy websites or something!”

“I like the one where Phil Coulson is really the president,” Bucky said.

Peter started laughing harder, needing to wipe away a tear from his eye.

Tony grumbled and turned his modified welder back on.

* * *

Thankfully, Tony finished his suit just moments before the alarm rang out and they were called to Assemble. They needed all hands on deck to defeat this week’s version of Doom Bots. Steve and Sam were already on the scene, having been nearby on a run when everything started to explode.

Tony gritted his tiny little teeth. Even though his suit was a brilliant feat of engineering, there was no way around it: he was tiny and he could only go so fast.

Rhodey passed by him, barely noticing him. “Sorry!” he said over the coms.

“I’ll catch up!” Tony replied.

He poured on the speed and arrived right in the thick of the battle.

Doom Bots were everywhere, causing mayhem and destruction with broken windows, cracked sidewalks, and bent lamp posts. Cars had been tossed around and people were being led away by police officers. A fire truck was already on the scene, putting out a fire. Sam was keeping Doom Bots at bay, allowing the firefighters to contain the flames before they could spread from the car in the street to something like the apartments not too far off.

“Report?” Tony asked. “Where are these things coming from?”

“We got a count of 200,” Steve replied. “They came from a central location—not sure if they’re a hive mind like last time.”

“Gotcha.”

The rest of it was a mess: robots exploding, robots getting smashed in by fists, or in one case, two of them colliding when they proved to have flight capabilities. Doom seemed to be exploring different methods for them to get around. Tony supposed the sewers were getting boring.

“Hey, I got an idea,” Tony declared, his mind buzzing with schematics and possibilities. He fired a few blasts, which weakened a panel on one of the robots. “I always wanted to do this!”

“Tony! What the hell—”

Steve’s voice was cut off when Tony dove into the electronics of the Doom bot. It was a pity that the designs were solid—he was sure these robots could be put to much better use than destruction and mayhem. But, Doom’s lack of foresight would be his loss. How much more money and bad press could Doom handle before it all sunk?

Linking into the control panel, Tony used a program he had before and cheered when it worked.

Then the robot started to make a strange sound.

“Uh-oh.”

“What do you mean ‘uh-oh’?” Steve exclaimed.

Tony had no time to reply, because he had to get out of there—

All of the robots exploded at the same time.

Everyone yelled.

Tony felt himself flying through the air.

* * *

“He’s regaining consciousness.”

Tony’s eyes fluttered as he registered JARVIS’s voice.

“Tony? Can you hear me?”

Tony stared as everyone stared down at him.

“Uh.”

Natasha flicked his forehead. His very _human_ forehead. “Don’t do that again. We might rely on cartoon logic sometimes, but that stunt was just stupid.”

“Yeah, underestimating villains are for newcomers,” Rhodey scolded. “You know this. How many cartoons did you make me watch when you were a teenager?”

“I needed someone to rant to,” Tony protested.

Steve shook his head. “Tony.”

“So, I’m back in the Tower?” he asked. God, he hoped he was. He could tell that he was naked under the sheets of his bed and he did not want to know how that happened. “Wait! Where’s my suit!”

“In pieces,” Clint answered. “We gathered them all up, but let me tell you, I saw parts of you I never wanna see again.”

Tony groaned and covered his eyes. “Oh god.”

“Hey! He did what I did!”

“Shut it, Clint,” Natasha said.

“How about we let him get some rest?” Bruce suggested. “I could go for some tea if anyone would like to join me.”

Steve remained as everyone made their way out, wishing Tony well.

“You scared me,” Steve said quietly, reaching up and stroking Tony’s hair.

Tony felt a pang of regret. “I’m sorry.”

Steve sighed and leaned down, kissing him softly. Tony sighed into it, realizing that he was stiff and sore, but oh, was kissing Steve like a soothing balm.

“Mm,” he sighed when Steve pulled away for air. “Can you do that again?”

“Yes,” Steve replied. “After I look at pictures of you as a squirrel.”

Tony sputtered. “W-What?”

“JARVIS took pictures for me. So did Bucky.”

“What?” he repeated.

Steve grinned at him. “Apparently, you were adorable. And fluffy.”

“No! JARVIS! Delete any and all evidence that I was a squirrel!”

“While I am happy to do that on our servers,” JARVIS said, “I am afraid that it would be unethical for me to delete such files from the personal servers and devices of Mr. Rogers, Ms. Romanoff, and others.”

“Traitor!”

* * *

“You know,” Steve began about a week later. “Did we ever figure out _why_ you were turned into a squirrel?”

Tony thought for a moment. “You know, no.”

“Well, as long as it doesn’t happen again.”

“Steve, look at our lives. It might not repeat, but something is bound to happen.”

Tony’s words came true when three days later, Steve was turned into a golden retriever.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Overall, being a dog was more mildly inconvenient than anything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it was pointed out to me that I didn’t really explain what happened in the previous chapter by Trez26 … Well, I guess it was a good thing, because here’s the continuation! Enjoy!

Being a golden retriever was … alright.

Sure, it took some time to adjust to being shorter than everyone else and having to walk with four legs, plus he could not control his tail one hundred percent of the time, but it wasn’t the worst thing in the world. He still felt like himself, so perhaps any change in perception was because of the changes of his physical form.

“You sure you’re fine, Cap?” Clint asked, crouching in front of him so they were eye-level.

“Yes,” Steve said, not sure how his mouth was working for that to happen. “I’m fine. Please stop asking.”

He was colorblind once more, but everything was still sharp and in focus. He wondered if there was a way to compare what a real dog actually saw and what he was seeing. Did the serum have any effect on this? Would his experience change depending upon what caused this? If he was changed by a mad scientist, would it be different from what Doctor Strange might be able to do?

Would there be more definition between shadows and highlights? Would he have better or worse depth perception? Dogs relied on their sense of hearing and smell more than humans, so was he experiencing more of that because of the serum or because of a dog’s baseline abilities?

Speaking of which—

“You need to brush your teeth.”

Clint gasped and covered his mouth. “How dare you! My dental hygiene is excellent!”

“Uh-huh.”

Steve heard someone approaching and if he was right, it was—

“Clint, please stop bothering Steve.”

Steve looked up to Bruce. “He’s just being annoying. Nothing unusual.”

“You don’t see the tennis ball he’s hiding behind his back.”

Steve turned and fixed his best ‘Disappointed Captain America’ face. Clint remained unaffected, only extremely put out by Bruce betraying him.

“You are a horrible betrayer of fun.”

“He is only in the form of a dog. He doesn’t have an urge to fetch things. Do you?” Bruce asked.

“No,” Steve confirmed. Standing up, he padded out of the room and looked around for Tony.

He had been trying to figure out what has turned Steve into a golden retriever. He didn’t accept Stephen Strange’s vague answer about magic and all that. It would eventually wear off, like Tony’s squirrel transformation did, but there were so many unanswered questions.

His nose tickled and—

He followed the scent of coffee, sugar, and motor oil. It was a strange combination of scents, but he would recognize what Tony smelled like anywhere. He also got another strange scent—something acidic. Not like lemons, but … He couldn’t place it.

Tony turned out to be in front of a computer with a number of windows opened up. Some of them were research, another one was scrolling with code, and more were various people talking just as animatedly as Tony was. He was raking a hand through his hair and had a few coffee mugs in front of him. Steve realized suddenly that he was smelling frustration. Interesting. Was that an ability all dogs had? Was that why animals seemed to be more sensitive to emotions?

Knowing Tony was deep in research and problem solving, and even though he was frustrated, he wasn’t reaching any sort of breaking point. Steve went over to one of the windows on the other side of the room and looked out over the city so he wouldn’t break Tony’s concentration.

Since waking up, he had no idea where his life would take him next.

He never imagined that after battling aliens— _aliens_ , like from one of his old dime novels—he would be invited to live in a tower that was just as futuristic as those dime novel plots and live with the most amazing assortment of people he had ever come across. No one could replace his friends from his own time, but Natasha, Sam, Bruce … He felt lucky to know every last one of them, even if there were times they clashed, fought, and acted like children.

He remembered Natasha standing up for him once, telling everyone to give him a break, he was still only in his twenties. Of course he would screw up a little more often, on account of his frontal lobe not being fully developed yet.

In retrospect, it also sounded like a jab, but it did remind him how young he was.

And how old he sometimes felt too.

The sun coming through the window felt wonderful. It was probably because of all his fur that he felt warmer than he normally would have, but …

He yawned and blinked awake. The sun was lower in the sky and Tony was no longer talking to a half dozen people on the computer. Instead, he was sitting down next to him and stroking Steve’s head.

“Hey there, sleepy head,” Tony said warmly.

“Hi,” Steve said, wishing he could pull Tony into his arms and kiss him. But that was a little hard to do right now. Tony stroking his head was really nice though.

“Like that, huh?” Tony teased, shifting his hand to scratch one of Steve’s ears.

“Oh, right there,” Steve said, leaning his hand into Tony’s. He didn’t even know he had an inch there, but it was likely all the fur. Something was bound to get irritated.

Tony chuckled and then started to scratch his whole head: his other ear, the corners of his jaw, his chin. It felt like heaven. No wonder dogs whined when it stopped. Steve shook his head to get rid of the haze of bliss that had fallen over him and rolled his eyes as Tony started to laugh.

“Hey! We’ll see if you like that once you’re back to your regular self!”

Steve swatted at him with his tail, but missed.

It was better to see Tony goofing off a bit than constantly stressed and overworked.

“Let’s watch a movie and get you something to eat. I’ll change back if you find a solution or not, so there’s no need to make yourself sick.”

Tony sighed and looked back at his monitors and keyboards before his stomach let out a faint gurgle. Tony probably couldn’t hear it like Steve could, but he likely felt it.

“Alright. Food it is,” he said, walking out into the hallway with Steve. “And something in black and white?”

Steve raised his eyebrows.

“Geeze, even in dog form you’re the fun police!”

“He’s only in the form of a dog,” Natasha said, not looking up from her tablet as she typed away on it. Or, from the look of concentration, she might have been playing a game.

“Besides, I was colorblind before. Not a big deal. At least I still have my hearing.”

“When did you lose your heating?” Clint asked, already seated on the couch and watching one cartoon program or another.

“Scarlet fever. I became deaf in one ear, but the serum brought it back.”

“Huh.”

Tony sat down and Steve clambered up, resting his head on Tony’s thighs. Tony automatically started to stroke his head.

“Hey, J, play something classic and fun.”

“Animation,” Clint requested.

“Very well,” JARVIS replied, selecting something at random. Given the amount of Disney movies that was in the archives, no one was surprised to see the logo sequence come up.

Steve closed his eyes and enjoyed the warmth of Tony’s hand as the narration for Beauty and the Beast began, the piano playing in the background.

He hoped that he would be back to his normal self soon.

If something happened—

He closed down those thoughts, not wanting to send himself into a spiral of anxiety, not when he had just pulled Tony out from doing the same. If anything happened, he knew that his team would be alright. They were all capable beings and he would find some way to give them support too. They had plans, training, and their own unique capabilities to defeat the crisis of the week.

Steve must have dozed off again, because he suddenly smelled lab chemicals, dust, and hot dogs—before he blinked, Peter had flopped onto the couch with a deep sigh. There was also a thick cloud of something stagnant and sour hanging over him. Steve recognized the frustration from earlier, but if the bags under Peter’s eyes were any indication …

Steve looked up at Tony and Tony responded with a slight smile. Clambering out of Tony’s lap, Steve went over and settled onto Peter’s. Peter was surprised for a moment, but it took him only a moment to start stroking Steve’s back.

“Patrol rough?” Tony asked casually.

“And I didn’t sleep so well last night,” Peter said with a yawn Steve couldn’t help but mirror.

“A nap sounds like a good idea,” Steve managed to say around another yawn.

Tony laughed. “You already took one!”

“So?”

Clint shushed them as he got up and draped a blanket around Peter’s shoulders. “No arguing. Only the soothing power of Disney.”

“Oh, this is a good part,” Peter commented, now noticing there was a movie on.

Tony looked back to the television to see Belle arguing with the Beast. “It is?”

Peter bobbed his head. “She’s a sixteen year old girl from a small town yelling back at a monster that can rip her throat out. Yes, it’s a good part.”

Steve chuckled and settled down, hoping that like he had seen with real dogs, his weight and presence in this form would help ease Peter’s anxiety some.

The rest of the movie passed with relative peace, until they stopped to get something to eat. Dinner ended up being an affair of leftovers and cobbling together random items from the fridge before they spoiled. Having fried pieces of pepperoni, ham, turkey, and chicken wasn’t the worst meal in the world, but Steve found himself craving chocolate.

“We’re not going to risk it,” Natasha said, even as she continued to drink her chocolate shake.

“And no bacon,” Clint snickered around a mouthful of a BLT. “None.”

Steve gave him an unamused look and made a note to not make enough bacon for breakfast the next time that he was able to cook.

“Aww, it’s alright Winghead,” Tony cooed, patting his head. “It’s because we love you.”

“Forgive me if I don’t believe you.”

“Steve, my precious, my love, I am wou—”

Stephen Strange suddenly came into the room with two girls following him: one seeming to be in high school, the other in elementary.

“I have found the source of your troubles,” Stephen declared.

Everyone looked at each other in confusion.

“Come again?” Tony asked.

The older of the two girls scowled. “Excuse me, but I went through the proper channels and reported all of this as soon as I found out.”

“Quite,” Steven replied. “It appears that Miss Alice, the younger girl here, here was practicing with some magic that was a little out of her current capabilities. Miss Lorna, her older sister, discovered the mischief.”

“I still made it happen!” Alice protested, her hands on her hips.

“And look what you did!” the older girl exclaimed, thrusting an arm towards Steve. “That’s Captain America! Turning our brother into a cat is one thing, but a national hero?!”

“So?!”

“So it can be fixed? You can undo this?” Steve asked, padding over. He hoped the girls would stop arguing.

“Of course,” Stephen replied. “Especially now that we know the source of it.”

Lorna stepped forward. “It’s a family spell, so only a family member can break it before the spell wears off. I apologize for what my sister has done. Mother is going to make sure she’s grounded for a long time.”

“Well, as long as she learned her lesson,” Steve said, hesitantly. Given how Alice was pouting with crossed arms, she probably had not. Hopefully, the family would keep any magic textbooks or items locked up from her for more than a week. And hopefully their brother was back to normal too.

Whispering some words, Lorna placed her hand on Steve’s head. In a flash of light, Steve was transformed to his human form, thankfully with clothes.

“There,” Lorna said, brushing her hands. “No more shedding or desire to chase balls.”

“Thanks,” Steve said dryly.

“And now, we will take our leave,” Stephen said, guiding the two girls through one of his portals. “A little girl needs to be grounded.”

Alice started protesting, but the closing of the portal cut her off.

“Thank god,” Tony muttered, hugging him. “I was not looking forward to the smell of wet dog.”

Steve laughed and hugged him back, glad to have fingers and two legs again.

“Please, I would have smelled like apple pies and you know it.”

Tony snorted. “And not liberty or something?”

“Come on, we all know liberty smells like a polling booth!” Clint exclaimed, grinning.

Steve rolled his eyes and went over, snatching Clint’s BLT.

“No, it smells like bacon.”

“Hey!”

**Author's Note:**

> PS: For anyone who lives in Milwaukee and loves it, my apologies. I am sure it is lovely. Clint is just biased.


End file.
